Freddy's Nightmares "It's A Miserable Life" (1988)

Well...we're off to the series. After the Freddy filled pilot episode that was No More Mr. Nice Guy, now we get a chance to see what the series is all about as the anthology format kicks in and Freddy is thrust out of the spotlight, relegated to several cameos and obligatory one-liners. "It's A Miserable Life" features young Bryan, a teenager stuck working at the "Beefy Boy" restaurant owned by his old man. Bryan can't wait to ditch the family business and good old Springwood, as he's got his sights set on college and "the big city". Stuck working the graveyard shift, Bryan takes a bullet to the noggin from a creepy biker, thus thrusting him into a netherworld where Beefy Boy is god and he's definitely not going to college. Pretty clunky segment doesn't offer a whole lot, as Bryan slowly comes to the realization that he's dead and stuck in some sort of Beefy Boy limbo land hell. This first part does introduce some of the dark humor that's prevalent in the series, though it's done much better in the second segment which focuses on Bryan's girlfriend Karen, who was also struck down by the shooter.

Hey...it's Lar Park Lincoln from Friday the 13th 7: The New Blood! Sorta cool to see a Friday the 13th heroine in an Elm Street venture, even if it's just the TV show. Lar Park plays Karen, Bryan's girlfriend who was also shot down by the same creepy shooter. Unlike Bryan, Karen's personal hell isn't being stuck in a Beefy Boy restaurant, it's being in the hospital. Karen's basically in the same no man's land that Bryan inhabited, only her time is spent being pushed around Springwood Hospital by a rather psychotic nurse and doctor who subject her to all sorts of various tortures, etc. The creepy killer also makes several cameos as he did in the first half, taunting Karen with his greasy hair and what not. Brrrr. The dark humor works much better here, and the doctor/nurse team really seemed to be enjoying their roles. Lar Park (what a weird fucking name) doesn't do much, but she is cute and makes me all warm feeling inside. Alas, she has no telekinetic powers here to help her out.

Freddy Say's:
"Now it's the graveyard shift..when I get hungry."
"Have it my way!"
"An apple a day ain't gonna keep me away."
"Remember, we make house calls."